Confessions of a Single Parent (Actress)

During this Labor Day weekend, I would like to take a break from the regular programming to speak about why I believe union membership is important to me. When I joined, I remember theaters paying $75 per week or simply nothing. This is probably why we are called starving artists. So when is art valued? When is the work so important that you can actually earn a living wage? When can you afford more than the dollar menu at McDonalds? Once I started working at professional theaters, I knew I wanted to join the union. I know that some of us feel as if we are better off without the membership and the dues. Some of us are afraid that work will simply dry up once we cross over. There is some truth to all of this. But, most of it is mired in the fear of change.When I got my first residual check from SAG, I was happier than a pig in butter. It convinced me even more. (And some of those checks still come 10 years later) As a Black female actress, my work is already limited. So why oh why ...

The show closed in New Hampshire on December 31. I flew to Philadelphia on January 1 after they de-iced the plane. (That was scary!) I washed my locs for the first time in weeks. (Don't judge me. It was never over 10 degrees in NH so why bother) I slept and woke up to catch a plane to Chicago on January 2. While in Chicago for the day, I posted several ads for a nanny in Rhode Island. I packed my daughter's things and headed back to the airport to catch a flight on January 3 to Providence. I interviewed and checked references on the same day. Rehearsal began January 4 and I brought Maya with me with a bag of toys and a portable DVD player (Life saver). I hired a nanny the same day and she started January 5.(She was amazing and still checks in on Maya from time time thanks to FB) That made me exhausted reading that. What I forgot to mention is how I got the small theater to agree to housing and transportation for me and my daughter? I paid for my daughter's plane ticket, b...

Before I headed to New Hampshire I attended an audition for Yellowman by Dael Orlandersmith. I only attended this audition because a dear friend (my artist warrior) brought to my attention that a theatre was seeking someone to play the role of Alma. I was fresh off the bus from Philadelphia after choreographing a fashion show and visiting my then boyfriend, I really just wanted to head to bed. This is why you need artist warriors in your life. They are the ones who will remind you that you need to take your ass to the audition even when you are feeling completely unmotivated. I have a few in my life and we are that voice of reason and inspiration for each other constantly. So after being cussed out over the phone, I headed to the audition. I did not have an appointment but their 11:30 am had not shown up. So the monitor asked if I would like to go in. Sure, why not? I entered the room and there are 2 gentlemen. I started and finished my monologue and then he started putting me thro...

Fall 2005, and I lived in New York City. I stopped teaching full-time because that is not why I moved from Chicago. I meet someone nice (more on him later). Guess what? I found a new agent. I began life as a substitute teacher for more flexibility. Funny, but true story. In a moment of panic (bills and a mortgage can do that), I interviewed for a teaching position at Anonymous Middle School in Astoria. Did not get hired. Sign up as a substitute, and get assigned to the same school for the same position that I did not get hired for. Principal informs me that the only reason I did not get hired is because I did not hold a NY teaching certificate. "You mean the one right here in my hand." Then he asked if I wanted the job because I was amazing as a substitute. I laughed out loud and said no! I love working half days because they allow me to audition, which is why I moved to NYC in the first place. He proceeded to tell me that he was only offering me a full time position and I co...

Boom! The calls stop coming from my new agent. You remember the one that I got with such ease? Well, I did not book anything soon and his patience was short.  It could have been because into every audition I carried my daughter not being in NYC, my desperation to make it, my need to prove that my move to NY was right. I brought so much with me, I forgot bring my talented self into the room. Boom Boom! A fellow artist said, "Girl, you are just happy to be in NY as a single woman with no child." Really?! This one had me wandering the streets of Bed Stuy convinced that she spoke the truth. And I cried. No, wept as I walked with literal strangers handing me tissues. Boom Boom Boom! I leave and the band that was keeping my musical strength alive falls to pieces. A personality and control malfunction tore it apart. Soul of a Chanteuse ended and I felt  a little lost. The most important part about all of these is that they occurred in total silence and with no support fro...

I know you are waiting to hear about the Boom. But, before I jump into that matrix, I would like to explore the finances connected to being an artist. It takes money to make money. It is more of an obstacle when the business barely produces a red cent in the beginning. Before moving to NYC, I spent money on headshots, voice lessons, coaching, scripts, copies of music, gas, plane tickets, a mortgage, property taxes, self-help books, and more and more bills. If you think that you can simply leap into this shit without a job that you tolerate or a kind sponsor then you are fooling yourself.  If you are not in a union, you may be earning $100 per week for your artistic efforts. Or nothing! So you better love this life because it does not always love you back. Once I hit NYC, that amazing show I spoke of earlier, Soul of a Chanteuse, cost me even more money. In fact, I have no idea how I paid a mortgage for an empty house in Chicago, rent in Brooklyn, the musicians, f...

I packed my bags and drove to New York City. Thanks to the kindness of a friend I had a floor to lay my air mattress on. I attended a job fair for the New York Board of Education and got offered a teaching position in Brooklyn. All of this in the heat of a New York City Summer. Ooh! The smell of yummy garbage in the air and the roaches that like to follow you to the train platform. Yes! Yes! Yes! I thought of a cabaret show (Soul of a Chanteuse). So I contacted the Duplex in lower Manhattan and booked some dates. Small problem. I had no musicians, script, or anyone to get to fill the seats. Soon the problem was solved thanks to Craig's list and some great promotional tools from my ex-boyfriend. I forgot to menion. I am still auditioning and teaching while I am trying to make this a reality. I never realized how much sleep is not necessary when you are focused. That three piece band made some great music. I was writing poetry an ancedotes daily. The city has that effect on ...

Yes. Pregnant. I thought I was experiencing stress. Is that why my period is missing, but I take birth control pills. Oh my God! What am I going to do? Then all of my Catholic/Preacher granddaughter guilt kicked in. "I'm not even married." "What the F***K!" Then my mother asked me some important questions. Can you take care of this baby alone? Will you be okay? Are you worried about still being able to act? We will work it out? I had to consider what I had thus far. (I had a house, a job with insurance, and some common sense) I can do this. Yeah, right! Then I gave birth to an amazing little girl. Besides the mind numbing pain and the epidural that really didn't work. I did it! She was born February 2, 2001 at 2:01 pm and was 21 inches long and 8 pounds. I'm a mommy! My life changed. And the first thing I did was leave my teaching job (Bye insurance!) because I refused to waste one more minute not pursuing my dreams and goals. I started audition...

During my senior year of high school, I was a thespian. Always in the background on stage, but outspoken in the halls of Mother McAuley. I was directing and choreographing, yet always in the chorus. Then my big break came with the Illinois Theater Festival. It was then that I realized I could actually do this. This acting thing. Soo I turned down my engineering scholarships and attended Millikin University and later University of Illinois in Champaign-Urbana. My grandma was so happy, "That I finally figured it out." According to her, I had been putting on shows since the age of 3 and needed to be pulled out of my denial. And my grandpa always said,"College is where you meet people and gain experiences, it is not the only ingredient needed to find a career." Maybe they were right. Battled the same ills I see in the world of performing today. Not enough actors of color on stage. Not enough professors of color in the theatre, music, and/or dance department. Not eno...

I graduated from undergraduate thinking that I had 5 years and then Broadway. Yes, just like those self-help books I had a plan. I started teaching for Chicago Public Schools in 1996 and quickly started taking voice lessons, getting headshots, more dance classes, and auditioning. I did a small play written by a woman who saved money cleaning hotels until she could achieve her dream of producing her musical. I met and worked with some amazing performers, but the script was a complete disaster. Guess what?! I did it anyway. Then I joined a band. We sang every cover known to man and it helped me to become an even better performer. Did I get paid for my early efforts? Hell no! And I even managed to purchase a house at the tender age of 23. And I barely slept. But, I knew then and still know now that no one owes me anything except for the experience I get from the work. No matter how tedious. This is a lesson lost on young, upcoming performers. Don't get me wrong money pays the bills, b...

I do things in reverse order. Or maybe not. I was supposed to hit it big, get married, and start a family. And travel the world with my ready made family. This is the story of what really happened and why I am still in the game. This is the truth about being a single Black parent actress and what it really looks like. I am a working actress. I am not famous, you may recognize me from a few scenes here and there. But I earn a living doing what I think is the most amazingly frustrating kind of work. And I love it! I will use my sarcasm and wit to tell you some anecdotes and hopefully inspire you to follow your dreams. And that dreams change. Sometimes without warning and things become better than you ever imagined.