Exhaustion - Self Care - Saying No

Recognize what you can control and RELEASE what you cannot...

 Let me just say that,  when folks ask me,  "How are things?" Or "How have things been going?" I often respond with a smile and a nod assuring them that everything is okay. We all do that. Especially women. But the truth is many of us are not okay. Many of us are simply tired, exhausted, depressed, and feeling as if our spiritual energy is simply depleted. We can point to many external things, such as, and not limited to, systemic racism, stupidity, toxic environmental health, poor access to mental health resources, the news, the lack of will of politicians, the economy, the job market (for artists and others), anti-history and anti-trans bills, or all the above including things not even listed here. OR, simply living in the midst of everything can wear a spirit and body down. 

So what to do?

In order for us to thrive and not simply survive, we must find what matters most to us as individuals. We must remember that we cannot change everything all at once, or even more honestly, we may never see change in our lifetime. So then we have to be still. In the exhaustion, and the weariness. We must find the spiritual fortitude to rejuvenate our hearts, minds, and souls. Or else. So I have started to get a monthly massage. Visit my doctor regularly. Rest. Stay connected with friends and family. And say NO because NO is a complete sentence. I have liberated myself slowly but assuredly from providing an explanation for my no, for my refusal. because I finally realize that choosing myself or my loved ones is no one's business but my own. You know what I speak of: "Oh, I am unable to be there because blah blah blah" "I can't pick up those additional hours because blah blah (insert some lie that makes my refusal okay for someone else). No more. 

What else can I do?

Not to view every rejection  or zero response that I receive as a personal affront. Rather, view it as the difficult but interesting journey to a YES. The YES that brings the least amount of baggage, obstacles, and crazy. Every YES is not meant for you and sometimes a NO can save your life and more honestly your sanity. Embracing the sadness and lows when they come, and being okay when sometimes I am unable to get to the other side, because there is always tomorrow, medication, spirituality, and therapy. 

But life is soo hard and crazy right now?

Do not lack courage and do not run away. Sit in the difficulty, because if not, the lesson will come again, and again until you pay close attention. And the next time it may be harsher just to get your attention. So sit in it the first time. Ask questions. Be reflective. If you learn how to sit in the dark, then you will be more prepared when the light comes again, 

So yes, I am exhausted, but I am not finished. Yes, I am still working to gather more moments of self care. And I am committed to the liberation of the word NO, and to expanding my spiritual growth and commitment to faith. 

FAITH brings YES

YES brings growth and opportunity

VISUALIZATION brings TRUTH and REALIZATION

NO ushers in LIBERATION