Thursday, February 23, 2017

The chickens coming home to roost

A few days ago marked a month in the Trump Presidency. In a month, there have been travel bans, lies, false terrorist attacks, LGTBQ threats, and more lies. Not to mention a cabinet that traded in their white sheets for a suit and tie, but did not trade in their beliefs. There have not only been daily and weekly protests, but the media has banned White House staff from speaking. Now this may appear as if I describing an episode of the Twilight Zone, but I am describing actual events, reality. The problem is the constant shock at how this happened. This is a problem because it is time for a crash course in karma.

Trump being President and all of the crazy that comes with it, is simply "The Chickens coming home to roost," as Malcolm X said so eloquently. When an entire country is built on the construct of racism and hate mongering, then the truth of that will manifest itself in leadership. And that is how we got here. We can always blame poverty and the unemployment rate. That argument always sounds like this, "Before you say that America is great make sure that everyone agrees." That is just a symptom of a bigger problem. This country has been playing the game of injustice, inequality and lack of access for so long that we forgot that it is the very reason that WE created a racial construct in the first place. The question is not why we use the term, "nigger," the question is, "Why do we need a nigger in the first place?" (James Baldwin)

Even are protests invite the marginalized to the table after the fact. And I despise the term marginalized, It makes it appear as if we have no power, Which could not be further from the truth. We have all the power because we have been privy to the actions, motives and tools of those in power for ALL of our lives, from birth. That makes us a powerful enemy if that is what we chose to be. If we chose to be the architects and the actors in the truth revolution there would be no contest. But, lucky for you we also strive for humanity and most of all we strive for a just world. But, none of this is possible if white tears continue to be collected in large buckets. This is not the time for tears. This is not the time for sympathy. This is not the time for well meaning social media posts that support your "marginalized" friends. This is the time for truth.

The truth is America birthed this presidency from her own blood, sweat, tears, and effort. America is a country where the American dream has been a nightmare for most. America is ready to be different because now everyone is thrust into a space of discomfort and panic. Maybe now we can throw off the shackles and truly deal in what is real and what has always been post-racial sanitized bullshit. Even the news can't stomach this BS. And that is a first.

Check your list of friends and comrades. Make sure that they include folks who do not look like you, live like you, or even think like you. Destroy the idea that real democracy every existed for everyone, and begin to build a better, more honest system that is actually democratic. Acknowledge the cycle of domestic violence that Brown and Black people have had with America forever.  Remember, one does not lynch, kill, tar and feather, rape, or terrorize anyone without being affected on a deep psychological level. Victims and abusers  are both mentally maligned. Recognize this truth and then healing can start.

So stop complaining and know that the highest levels of poverty and death from depression exist in native communities, Black and Brown communities, and that Trans women of color are killed at the highest rate, yet their deaths go unspoken. This is just a small list of the debts that have been collected and unpaid by American society. Now those bills are due. Karma is a bitch.



A life of almost and could haves

Watching This is Us, I am struck by the line, "I have lived a life of almost and could haves." What also struck me was the contentment that the character felt in saying the line. Maybe contentment is the wrong word. He felt okay and had clearly forgiven his choices so that he could move on or better yet, so that he could live in the present. These conversations that we have with ourselves usually occur when we are evaluating the life that we have lived in order to make our next steps. I needed to see this. And more importantly, I needed to hear this.

Life as an artist is one filled with hills and valleys. It is also filled with fear and uncertainty. Unlike most career choices, this is one that is seldom understood by the majority and even worse it is only fully seen by other actors and performers. How does one continue in this life with no fear? How do you conquer your internal demons? You don't. The answer is that the fear will always be there. And if you have faith, then you can ride this pathway and remember, "This is a marathon not a race." Do not listen or remain in the presence of those who have never understood what it means to dream, live or better yet, breathe. And do not seek those who will sit in judgement and condemnation.

The line in This is Us reminded me that I must remember the blessings, the heartache, and the bullshit. And I must be grateful for all of it. All define who I am, and the lessons are God's whispers into my life, heart and soul. So I say yes to this path, and I say yes to the hills and valleys, and more importantly, I say yes and thank you to God for granting me the work ethic, talent, and spirituality necessary to be exactly where I am.

So hear me when I say this. Live your best life. Allow God into your heart and remember that His plan is always better than yours. Share your gifts and talents. Speak and live in your truth. Forgive yourself when you fall short and love yourself when you do terrible things. Always pick yourself up. And always give an open hand to those in generosity. Remember that a Higher Power sees you in the dark and the light. And always give negative fucks when folks try to irk you.

This is how I will never live a life of "almost and could haves."

Thursday, February 9, 2017

The Big Fat Nothing

This is the time that most actors dread. The hiatus between gigs. Or even worse, a long break between gigs. You are pounding the pavement going to audition after audition, Callback, put on hold, interested and then NADA! Back on the grind you go.

This is when you become easily annoyed and you start looking at regular jobs as if they could be your salvation. Mostly because you begin to doubt what you are trying to do in the first place. And of course, I am grateful for the work and the opportunities. Blah Blah Blah! At this moment, I just want to bitch and moan about my unemployment as a professional actor. Thank you now back to me.

What am I going to about it?

Recenter myself through prayer, meditation, laughter, and quiet. Learn some new music. Memorize some new monologues. Update my voice over demo. Stop bitching!

And remember that I was completely miserable at those soul sucking "regular" jobs and none of them brought me "magical" financial security. And then I am going to continue a side of bitching and moaning just for practice.

This is for all of my fellow artists out there. For those of you that continue be on your grind and always put in the work, remember that your art is never limited to being chosen for a project. You can always be the master of your own destiny thanks to your inherent creativity. While you are thinking of what's next. I have another short film to write, cast, film, and produce. And less bitching and moaning.


Beyond the Hashtag - Lessons of Philly Black Lives Matter Week

Two weeks ago, a group of educators in the Caucus of Working Educators sponsored a Black Lives Matter week in Philadelphia. The initial idea for the action was inspired by Seattle Public School teachers who wore Black Lives Matters shirts in support of their Black and Brown students. An action to lift these students up and to highlight the systemic racism that continues to exist and pervade every aspect of American society.

I want to talk about some of the lessons learned from the week. Lesson #1, not everyone is prepared or ready to face their own privilege and racism. Lesson #2, the voices of the youth are always honest and on point. Lesson #3, studying movements provides the words necessary to change hearts and minds by dealing in truth rather than lies and conjecture. Lesson #4, organized labor unions and school districts continue to battle with the intersection of race and teaching and learning.

Lesson #1
I have been doing this work for a lifetime. Ever since I discovered that my life was not of any value outside of my internal circle. The day I realized that I was treated differently because of the color of my skin. Every time, I have encountered an individual or a group of individuals who believe at their core that their privilege means that they do not have to grow. Who can live and not grow? Folks protected by white privilege. That's who! The fact that they continue to exist confirms the truth that some folks are not ready to face their own privilege and the truth of racism. And as a parent, I have a problem with that kind of person being a teacher at any school.

Lesson #2
I cannot tell you how much I learned from the youth this week. The conversations were rich and robust. Teachers worked with their students and prepared them for some difficult conversations centered on the 13th amendment, mass incarceration, systemic racism, Moonlight, gender labels, LGTBQ power, and suggestions of what we should all be doing in order to be a better society. This week proved that our students are waiting to think critically about themselves and the world that they live in. It proved that school should take more risks and that educators should push themselves and their students into topics that may cause discomfort, but will ultimately end up in purposeful edification.

Lesson #3
It is time to love in truth. Stop crying tears of remorse and shock, Get off of your ass and face the facts about race and the gifts of knowledge embedded in the 13 guiding principles of the Black Lives Matter Movement. Stop worrying about if you think Black Lives should matter, and consider what it says about you if you think that they do not. And then look to what is happening in the White House if you require a more visceral example.

Lesson #4
When it comes to the workforce and the creation of jobs, the strengthening of labor unions is vital. For Black and Brown communities who can often be relegated to low income jobs or at charter schools with minimal job protection/security. When unions stand and spout that Black Lives Matter, what do they mean? Some local progressive unions engage in real work when it comes to communities of color. In fact, in order to adapt to the changing climate of the teaching force, it is important that unions make more democratic decisions and fewer top down ones. It is also important to stretch across the aisle and support other unions and organizations that are working in the very communities that our students reside. This builds trust and relationships that can result in sustainable change. Let's face it, any movement that does not include our children and families at the core is a false one that will not move the needle at all.