Confessions of a Single Parent (Actress)

Today, I was awakened with a memory about two places that could have either pushed me to where I am now, or they could have pushed me on an entirely different trajectory. This memory reminded me that words have power and that teachers and/professors can use their power for good or for harm. This is for anyone who was told they were not good enough and for those who were relegated to the sidelines or even worse rendered silent. The first place that taught me this lesson was my high school, Mother McAuley. First, let me say that the opportunities and programs available at this school were amazing. But there was also a door, an invisible one that allowed some to participate and some to be left out. When it came to students of color there were hardly any. In fact there were only three of us in the honors program. The first thing I did was audition for the school musical. Now I was told, "You are probably not going to get cast because they never cast Black students." Well no mat...

Today, I taught a great class. One of the discussions centered on honesty and relationship building. Then that leaped directly into goals and the ability to do better or wanting better. This made me realize that society is filled with broken people who are unable to get to their dreams and if you are not careful they will run ramshod through yours. If you let them. First let me define what I mean by the term "brokenness." It is a state of being where one continues to experience trauma because they have not sought professional help or because they continue to repeat the trauma, which then creates a cycle of broken relationships, unaccomplished goals, and unachievable growth. Often, we have someone or a few soomebodies who fit this description as a friend or as a family member. Sometimes we even encounter them in an intimate relationship or as a parent. In the artistic world they can manifest as peers who simply can never get out of their own way and every obstacle they...

I wake to the news of a rally at the University of Virginia. The "Unite the Right" rally of white nationalists and other right-wing groups. All under the guise of protecting history. The chants included, "Blood and Soil" and "You will not replace us." Jason Kessler, an organizer of the rally had this to say, "We're going to start standing up for our history." And more importantly he does not consider himself to be a white nationalist. In February, the city voted to rename two parks and to remove other Confederate symbols. A move that is occurring across the South in response to the 2015 shooting at Mother Emanuel which took 9 lives. But, in Charlottsville, Virginia folks marched against such actions with torches (only the white hoods were missing). The mayor released the following statement describing the rally as a, "cowardly parade of hatred, bigotry, racism, and intolerance march down the lawns of the architect of our Bill of Rights...

Every now and then I have to evaluate if I am using my time wisely. Often I am guilty of signing up for another responsibility, another cause or another project. And then before I know it, I am dreading attending meetings or I book a show out of town which takes me out of the loop completely. This is when I have to decide what needs to be shed from my life. I have to decide what and who fits seamlessly into my single parent actress activist existence. Sometimes I receive support for my decisions and sometimes I don't. Sometimes I can have am honest conversation about why I did what I did, and sometimes I select to have a very filtered conversation. So thanks to my time in the Aspen mountain air, I just got rid of some more stuff. And it felt good and more importantly it felt necessary. Because I also forgot to mention that these moments are some of the few times that I make decisions just for me and for my soul. So yes, it always feels good and as I get older it happens more ofte...

In a few days, I will have a birthday. Another turn around the sun. Another year to live above ground. Each year, I take a look backwards in order to recognize where I am currently standing. In order to remind myself that it is better to live in the present and look to the future, then to dwell on the past. Often, we get mired down in the would've, could've and should've game. It is one that is usually fueled by fear and regret. The fear of actually letting go and simply letting life happen. And the regret that your life is not as good as your neighbors or a complete stranger who you have never met. Social media makes this game even more arduous because we get easily saddened and jealous when we look at the successful "Facebook lives" that scroll before us. How did that person every get all of the great stuff? They are not even good people. Why do I have to suffer endlessly? Blah Blah Blah Whine Whine Whine (cue) tears. When we are actually living these games ...

I am currently doing Hairspray in Aspen, Colorado. Each day and night, I am simply in awe of the clear sky, the beautiful mountains, and the star filled night. Not to mention the wonderful new friends I have made since being here. In other words, I am living my best life. While away, my daughter spent 8 beautiful days in Costa Rica. She saw jaguars, toucans, monkeys, and literally had a life changing experience. In other words, she is also living her best life. Soon she and my mother will be Baltimore to compete in the NAACP ACT-SO competition with her short story. There are moments that I truly wish that I could share this beautiful city with her and my mom, but due to timing and scheduling that will be impossible, this time. This artist life at times keeps you away from family and friends, and that is never easy. Now back to how I am living my best life. Walking everyday. No fast food. Movie nights. Laughter. Swimming. Mountain views. And most of all doing what I love, performi...

"How much of human life is lost in waiting?" Henry David Thoreau Today, this quote truly resonates with me. I have friends that are experiencing some life altering stuff at the moment, positive, negative, and challenging. I also just recently met someone during my stay here in Aspen just to discover that they died in a tragic accident just a few days ago. Life and Death.  I am reminded that we have to decide how we want to live our life. Do we want to wait until the right moment or should we risk everything just to find joy and contentment? How can we overcome obstacles and what should we do when we feel as if an avalanche of bullshit is attacking us at every turn? In the midst of each of these extremes, how can we choose the light? Even better, how can we find the light within us to shield away even the darkest of days? For some, the darkness represents a challenge of faith and test of our courage. For some, the darkness represents unresolved issues that need o...