Another opening night has passed. And despite the number of shows you mount, each one has its own unique flavor. Some have me on edge and others feel like I am ready to tackle the world. No matter my personal level of angst of calm, the show must go on.
The process leading up to opening night can last 2-3 weeks. That schedule includes a single day off and lots of homework. Homework includes learning the lyrics, remembering the harmonies, blocking, lines, and if it is a new space that you have never worked learning where everything is. And if you have a single line or scene on a film you may have to learn the lines in the trailer on the same day that you are shooting.
And because this is a marathon not a race, you continue to audition for future projects so that work continues. Now place this on top of having a family and you realize the process includes being completely unbalanced and chaotic in the midst of sheer joy and adrenaline.
Several days during the process, once everything is set tech happens. That is when you add the lights, and everything else that is required to make the show even more fabulous. And this is the time that one must be flexible because things are going to change. That hard wired blocking may be something entirely different for so many reasons that no one person can ever keep up. So if you are seeking perfection or some idea of it, this may not be the business for you.
The night before opening and even auditions, I usually get the least amount of sleep because my brain is racing through everything that I am responsible for. And this happens each time, each year, no matter what. This feeling follows me to film and television sets too. And the adrenaline kicks in once I wake up and the rush is like no other. But after it ends, I sleep like my life depends on it.
Opening night adrenaline cannot be explained. But it is like no other. Whenever I am on the cliff of doubt. You know the one that questions why the hell you are doing this in the first place. All of those opening nights, days on the set, and new shows are an amazing reminder of why you and I keep saying yes, yes, yes!
Friday, July 18, 2014
Sunday, July 6, 2014
Single working parents cannot so we always do
Some things wake you up and lead you to write. That happened today. I started this blog to have a conversation about what being a working actor looks like on the tapestry of being a single parent. Well there are many times that the village you have created simply comes down to a single villager, me.
My daughter is working on publishing her first book and she is 13. Now as exciting and cool as that sounds, as she grows into a writer and she continues to develop her abilities as an artist, I realize that she needs a new village. She told me the other day as we were pulling an all niter filled with stress, heated conversation, and eventually finding her voice that she needs to take classes in creative writing and possibly be more social and join a book club. And then she went to bed. And it sent me to bed for a wonderful sleepless night.
I quickly started researching options in Philly and Chicago and many of them are already closed for the summer or require me to split myself into 2. You see, while I am trying to make sure that my daughter finds these opportunities, I am also in rehearsal for a concert or auditioning or teaching. It is a full time full week commitment with only a single day off each week. This pisses me off because it is my constant reality in the world of single parenthood.
I have reached out to adults to mentor her but that continues to fall to the wayside. Not because of my lack of diligence and follow up, but because some cannot get past that she is thirteen and ready to write and continue to write better. If you read this and know of someone who will actually email me back please let me know because she is a captive audience.
I wish she could find what she is looking for at school, but that is not probable when the current state of public schools is one that simply has no space to fill this need. This is why, my Maya spends countless hours in front of the computer watching you tube tutorials for inspiration, technique, and vision. She spent nearly 8 hours teaching herself how to draw wolves more realistically and accurately just a few days ago. And she carries a clipboard with her to school, daily, so that she can draw and write down story ideas.
Single parents cannot be at two places at once so we simply keep doing and doing and going and going until we can. And that is where the insanity appears in the form of exhaustion. Because as many read this, they will either shake their heads or they will say well that is why you should never have children alone. This reflection is not to garner kudos or detractors, it is simply me using my blog to share.
And the positive part, the glass half full part of this observation is that Maya pursues her art like breathing because I do. I am not quite sure if that is as good as it sounds. But we are figuring this out as I balance being her mother, her confidant, her editor/publicist, her motivator, her teacher, her chauffeur, and simply the silence she needs to be quiet, calm and creative.
My daughter is working on publishing her first book and she is 13. Now as exciting and cool as that sounds, as she grows into a writer and she continues to develop her abilities as an artist, I realize that she needs a new village. She told me the other day as we were pulling an all niter filled with stress, heated conversation, and eventually finding her voice that she needs to take classes in creative writing and possibly be more social and join a book club. And then she went to bed. And it sent me to bed for a wonderful sleepless night.
I quickly started researching options in Philly and Chicago and many of them are already closed for the summer or require me to split myself into 2. You see, while I am trying to make sure that my daughter finds these opportunities, I am also in rehearsal for a concert or auditioning or teaching. It is a full time full week commitment with only a single day off each week. This pisses me off because it is my constant reality in the world of single parenthood.
I have reached out to adults to mentor her but that continues to fall to the wayside. Not because of my lack of diligence and follow up, but because some cannot get past that she is thirteen and ready to write and continue to write better. If you read this and know of someone who will actually email me back please let me know because she is a captive audience.
I wish she could find what she is looking for at school, but that is not probable when the current state of public schools is one that simply has no space to fill this need. This is why, my Maya spends countless hours in front of the computer watching you tube tutorials for inspiration, technique, and vision. She spent nearly 8 hours teaching herself how to draw wolves more realistically and accurately just a few days ago. And she carries a clipboard with her to school, daily, so that she can draw and write down story ideas.
Single parents cannot be at two places at once so we simply keep doing and doing and going and going until we can. And that is where the insanity appears in the form of exhaustion. Because as many read this, they will either shake their heads or they will say well that is why you should never have children alone. This reflection is not to garner kudos or detractors, it is simply me using my blog to share.
And the positive part, the glass half full part of this observation is that Maya pursues her art like breathing because I do. I am not quite sure if that is as good as it sounds. But we are figuring this out as I balance being her mother, her confidant, her editor/publicist, her motivator, her teacher, her chauffeur, and simply the silence she needs to be quiet, calm and creative.
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