Welcome to the audition hamster wheel. You know the one where you continue to audition and get called back but then do not book the gig. You feel awesome in the room. They are laughing or crying during your audition and you are feeling, awesome. Then you come home to silence and no gig. Maybe if I say it louder, the cheap seats will understand. NO GIG! NO GIG! NO GIG! I feel so much better now.
You may ask yourself, Is this where you give up? Where you lay down and say well I tried, time to go back to a normal existence where rejection does not exist. The truth of the matter is rejection is around every corner and in every aspect of life. Actors, performing artists, and other artists are simply faced with it on a constant basis. This is when you jump off that hamster wheel and find breath and actual living before you lose it. This is when your spiritual toolkit becomes handy. It is vital that you find joy in this business. It can be in writing, producing a short film, practicing yoga, swimming (my personal fave), working out, learning a new monologue, practicing a new song, going to see a play, watching a movie, reading a book, or whatever it takes that makes you breathe again. Because if you sit there and count each and every time that someone tells you no and then try and figure out why, this life will eat you up and spit out the remaining pieces of your soul.
Cherish the wins. Each callback. Each positive response in the room. Each new relationship that you develop from a meeting. Do not get mired in the bullshit of the hamster wheel. I pray that you have a higher power that you believe in and that your faith is strong. I also pray that you are honest enough to know that you should always be sharpening the saw when it comes to your talent and skill because God seldom blesses the lazy or the mediocre. Live. Breathe. And live again. Do not simply exist or survive. Follow the master plan for YOUR life because God gave each of us a unique path. When we walk on someone else's we may encounter some obstacles that were never meant for us. And STOP trying to be the boss of God's plan for you. Take these moments of rejection for some quiet contemplation. And listen. We have the tendency to always think smaller than the greatness that God has in store for us.
This is a marathon not a race. Every break matters and each one gets us closer to the consummate artist that each of us strive to be. And for those with a lottery mentality, who are just seeking fame, or those unwilling to put the work in, THIS message is not for you.
Sunday, October 30, 2016
When a Turnaround is not the fix
This month has been filled with scheduled community meetings at 11 Philadelphia Public Schools that have been pegged to be changed as a result of their School Progress Report, an evaluation that scores schools on a scale of 1 to 100. The evaluation is based largely on academic factors but attendance and climate is also rated. On October 27th, Newsworks published an article by Dale Mezzacappa and Avi Wolfman-Arent, which discussed the differences between the meetings that occurred at Kensington Health Sciences Academy and Benjamin Franklin High School.
There were vast differences in the level of engagement. Kensington had about 150 in attendance and Benjamin Franklin had 10. One is a smaller school with a staff and principal that have been there longer, and Benjamin Franklin has a new principal who has been bounced around to a few places. At the end of the day regardless of the level of engagement at any of the 11 meetings, The higher ups at the School District of Philadelphia have a plan for all 11 schools. And they usually enact their edicts with little to no input from the school communities. How many times have we seen organized rallies and protests at schools begging the administration to look beyond the test scores? How many times have we seen charter school conversions occur despite the opposition of the community? The answer is time and time again. And when they place a new model over an existing school community they seldom increase the funding or supports, they just make the changes and wait for it to crash and burn. So then they can come back and say, "See, this IS a failing school." It is exhausting to watch and it is discouraging when you know that there are actually no good intentions hiding in the wings.
They had meetings several years ago about, "What makes a high performing school?" Remember how well those went. At the center of this debacle are children and families. That is what is most important. If the higher ups never ask, "What would I want for my child and family?" Then a conversation is doomed from the start. And if a decision has already been made then what is the true purpose of the meetings in the first place?
There were vast differences in the level of engagement. Kensington had about 150 in attendance and Benjamin Franklin had 10. One is a smaller school with a staff and principal that have been there longer, and Benjamin Franklin has a new principal who has been bounced around to a few places. At the end of the day regardless of the level of engagement at any of the 11 meetings, The higher ups at the School District of Philadelphia have a plan for all 11 schools. And they usually enact their edicts with little to no input from the school communities. How many times have we seen organized rallies and protests at schools begging the administration to look beyond the test scores? How many times have we seen charter school conversions occur despite the opposition of the community? The answer is time and time again. And when they place a new model over an existing school community they seldom increase the funding or supports, they just make the changes and wait for it to crash and burn. So then they can come back and say, "See, this IS a failing school." It is exhausting to watch and it is discouraging when you know that there are actually no good intentions hiding in the wings.
They had meetings several years ago about, "What makes a high performing school?" Remember how well those went. At the center of this debacle are children and families. That is what is most important. If the higher ups never ask, "What would I want for my child and family?" Then a conversation is doomed from the start. And if a decision has already been made then what is the true purpose of the meetings in the first place?
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